Updated: Aug 30, 2022
Ever since I was young enough to read, I was interested in learning and researching information. I never really fancied fictional books. I preferred books that had a story that was worth telling. A story of real-life, real experiences, and real knowledge. Knowledge, for me, does not come from books or other people's minds, it is something that comes from within. It is an inspiration of the heart, and that is the sort of information I like to receive. Whether it is by books, movies, spoken word, or downloaded to me from above (or below), I have always craved more depth and truth in knowledge.
When I was young and at school, it was evident I was dyslexic and had a good amount of attention deficit. This was the 1970’s and ADHD had not yet been discovered. I imagine I was bored with what was being presented to me. The information I was being fed did not fit my criteria of what it was I wanted to receive in terms of knowledge. I remember being taken to a school reading level expert and she told my mother I was too immature for reading. I was in grade 4. The expert recommended I was given books that were below my age level, that would improve my ability to learn, or so she thought. With all honesty. The woman was not seeing the whole picture. From the age of four, I read toilet paper packaging, cereal packaging, and actually just about any packaging I came across. I was curious about what was in products, or at least what the manufacturers were willing or able to reveal. That's right, you read that correctly. I was 4 years young and apparently unable to read even in grade 4, yet I was reading, comprehending, and assessing information way beyond Jack & Jill at the tender age of 4.
How did I deal with this inconsistency between what others were seeing and what I was experiencing. . I closed my eyes in class and went into different worlds. My world to be fair. This status pretty much describes my level of enthusiasm for school and the curriculum they were presenting to me. My world was far more interesting.
I was never really great academically as you can well imagine, a B student at best, an E student once for French, which I didn't have the slightest interest in. Yet, here I am. I have led an extraordinary life, full of love, laughter, and abundance in all things. And I would say a successful life.
So back to why I write. I write for all the people that are like me and are too afraid to put their thoughts on paper, else they be judged by others. The others that judge, well I could say they are just main stream, but that is not really fair. They have made a decision in their reality to buy the information that was fed to them and accept it as truth. Just like me really. I am simply choosing to believe something else. I describe myself as an unofficial scientist.
Scientist SHOULD keep experimenting until they prove themselves wrong. That is not what I witness for many science people in the industry. I am committed in this life to keep testing, reading, and receiving information until I can prove myself wrong.
I write for you but mostly I write for myself. It's cathartic to see my thoughts and the thoughts that others have transmitted to me on a page. They seem less to belong to me and more to belong to a collective vision.
My collective vision is that we don't all think alike, but that we allow each other to think about our own dream realities and have respect and love for it all. Unraveling our bullshit stories and triggers will help us get there. I'm but just one cell in a whole cosmic universe of multiplex cells that create the one.
Enjoy, or not, my rantings and sharings.