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Why I wrote Triggered as fuck

Updated: Aug 31, 2022

Triggered as fuck was born in the first six months of covid. It was actually a chapter of another book I have written, yet to be published, called ‘Triggers’. The more I read the chapter on ‘Triggers’, the more I felt the urge to share this very important information that was coming through my higher self.

I was starting to build my social media at the time, so I decided to design a webinar around the information from ‘Triggers’ and renamed it ‘Triggered’. It went extremely well with over 80 participants. I then made the decision to start delivering the webinar as a workshop, and as I delivered the content, the content grew. And so did the crowds. Most people would sit quietly, jaws dropped, and afterward express their amazement at the simplicity yet the importance of the message. Most had epiphanies that were life-changing.

The workshop and content grew from valuable feedback from my husband at the time, Rob Dubois, and course participants, but mostly from the experiences I was having navigating my way through a world that appeared to me, as others were not on the same planet as me. The content grew as I grew.

To put it plainly, like many others in the world, I was seriously triggered during the pandemic.

Why? Because I had a very different worldview than many people in my life, especially those living in a different country to me. What they were experiencing was so far from my reality and my worldview, that I found it hard to even seek compassion in my heart. I was angry.

This anger led me to dive even deeper than I had in the past through my plant medicine journeys, my yoga exploration, and my previous relationships.

When we are triggered it is a beautiful opportunity for us to see what is yet to be healed inside of us. When I say healing, I mean integrated. Not made to disappear. You see we are both, light and dark. As Bashar says, we are both light and dark, it is the acceptance and integration of this that will save us.

There is this belief in most people's physical minds that we need to choose this or that. Or that experiences, people are either this or that. Nothing could be further than a universal truth. We are this or that. Experiences are this or that. There is no right or wrong. Just your perception and mine. Perception is made up of all of the moments, memories, and experiences we have had, and NO TWO PEOPLE'S' perceptions or perspectives are the same. They cannot be, as each and every one of us is creating our own reality based on our past.

In June of 2021, I joined a suicide hotline as a volunteer. The hotline was set up to assist Balinese and Bules in Bali as there had been a huge increase in the number of suicides. If you have read my blog, ‘No stranger to suicide’ you will know it is a matter dear to my heart.

The hotline went well initially then exploded due to social media exposure through TikTok and Twitter, and within a very short space of time, there were up to 3000 calls coming through per day. Many callers were from Java and other large islands in Indonesia. The common theme coming through from the callers was that they felt empty, couldn't feel anything, and felt like they had no purpose in life. Basically, they felt numb, robotic. I am not surprised as I have through my counseling work and yoga teaching history met many people who have been on autopilot most of their lives, being spoon-fed information and instructions from school, media, and governments. Not many people take the time to be quiet, to disengage from activities that disrupt their peace. The world is busy. People's lives are busy. People's minds are busy. So when the pandemic hit, many people were at a loss of what to do and what direction they should take. Not many understood that it is enough to just be. To do nothing and listen to the voice of the heart.

So Triggered as fuck was both a combination of a personal journey and an account of clients. It was a journey of discovery, unraveling, unpacking diving deep. Dark nights of the soul fed the words on the pages and brought the book into existence.

I hope you get the opportunity to read my book ‘Triggered as fuck’ take from it what you will and find a way to more was and peace in your life.

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